By Arthur J Licursi

In managing interpersonal relationships among Christians there is a sequence of events that should occur between people. The normal Christian process of dealing with our sin against another person is as follows.

- When they sin against any other person, the innate God-given Inner Peace of a person who is saved and reconciled to God becomes lost and … replaced with the sense of Guilt.

- Guilt is witnessed by the Conscience of “the spirit of man” bearing upon his soul’s mind as Conviction… to prompt one to deal with the offense.  If resisted, then the Conviction can grow to become a near torment, or… it can be buried in the sub-conscience awaiting a later life-crisis.

- Thus, Guilt exerts inner pressure upon the soul’s mind until the offender… Confesses, admitting guilt, seeking the forgiveness of the offended party.

- With forgiveness received, the Inner Peace is restored in the offender, and the account is closed. The Lord is our example.

“As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he [God] removed our transgressions from us. ¹³ Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear him. ¹⁴ For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are dust. Psalm 103:12-14 (KJV)

HOWEVER with forgiveness Withheld, the apologizing Offender still has Inner Peace restored, but … the Offended one now has inner-pressure working in them toward reconciliation.

- If the Offender Refuses To Admit Guilt, or if the Offended one Refuses To Forgive, the pressure can build-up unbearably and nobody knows what could come of it in either case.

The Complicating Factor:

The non-Christian Offending one or the non-Christian Offended one lacks inner “Peace of God.”

The inner “Peace of God” enjoyed in the soul’s mind and is intended to be the arbitrator Guiding the believer into proper decision making.

Thus we are admonished by the Apostle Paul to;

“And Let The ‘Peace of God’ Rule [lead] In Your Hearts…” Colossians 3:15 (KJV)

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32 (KJV)

Both Rejecting the Sense Of Guilt and Refusing To Forgive are toxic to the soul. Sadly, it is often then buried in the sub-conscience and all is unresolvable… until a Life Crisis forces the distressed one to face and deal with it all in “the Truth.”

Here below the Apostle Paul offers us a clear definition of ‘Christian Love’

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (AMP)
⁴ Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.
⁵ It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].
⁶ It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. ⁷ Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].